“On the other hand, you have different fingers.” ~ Steven Wright

“On the other hand, you have different fingers.” ~ Steven Wright

Five reasons to drink:

  1. Both sugar and sweetner will make you fat.
  2. A colleague described my desk as a “theatre of cruelty” after my beautiful birthday lilies started to die of thirst – all the water in the vase evaporated over the weekend. I also killed a pot plant last week.
  3. My computer has been making a dreadful whirrrrrrrrrrr ghrghghhgghghh whirrrrrrrrr noise for the past several weeks. I finally sent a vexed email to IT. IT guy came, looked at the computer for half a second and said, “It’s the fan.” Humiliation is mine.
  4. I never stop doing dishes. NEVER.
  5. I’m single. While most interpret that as a bad thing (hell, I do sometimes too) it actually means fun nights out with the girls… where we DRINK!
  6. BONUS REASON TO DRINK: Toxic waste will kill you and NOT turn you into a super hero. I know, right! WTF!

Toxic waste may cause harm

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